If your tires won't stick, you must acquit

I love it. You can't make this kind of stuff up.

"Drinking when your truck stuck in mud is not DUI, judge rules"

"The fact that his truck was so deeply stuck in a waterfilled ditch that he couldn't drive out is what saved a 31-year-old man from a drunk driving conviction."

I'll spare you the details of this hard-hitting Start Phoenix investigative report - other than to note that justice prevails in Saskatchewan when it comes to the important things in life: mudding, giant 4x4s, beer, and small-town Sunday night house parties. You can be sure of that - this story of a guy who got stuck, drunk, arrested, then acquitted (in that order) is the most read story on the Star Phoenix website.

What I don't get it what was the cop's problem? What the hell else are you supposed to do when your truck is stuck in the mud in the middle of buttfuck nowhere Saskatchewan? That nice cold 8-pack of Pil' ain't gonna drink itself, now is it? No wonder the two ended up wrestling around in the mud. They probably shook hands after and became best buds.

Thankfully, justice was handed down by a judge. And be thankful it didn't go to a jury - can you imagine what would have happened had this case been decided by a group of this man's peers? How long would the deliberations have been? They would have spent weeks debating whether the truck got stuck because it was a Ford or a Chevy (with the accompanying Calvin pissing sticker). They also would have spent endless time arguing over whether the real culprit was the field - and the traction difference between canola and wheat. Even if they resolved that, another two weeks would have been spent arguing whether the policeman should be charged instead for killing a good buzz.