Friday, December 20, 2013

If your tires won't stick, you must acquit

I love it. You can't make this kind of stuff up.

"Drinking when your truck stuck in mud is not DUI, judge rules"

"The fact that his truck was so deeply stuck in a waterfilled ditch that he couldn't drive out is what saved a 31-year-old man from a drunk driving conviction."

I'll spare you the details of this hard-hitting Start Phoenix investigative report - other than to note that justice prevails in Saskatchewan when it comes to the important things in life: mudding, giant 4x4s, beer, and small-town Sunday night house parties. You can be sure of that - this story of a guy who got stuck, drunk, arrested, then acquitted (in that order) is the most read story on the Star Phoenix website.

What I don't get it what was the cop's problem? What the hell else are you supposed to do when your truck is stuck in the mud in the middle of buttfuck nowhere Saskatchewan? That nice cold 8-pack of Pil' ain't gonna drink itself, now is it? No wonder the two ended up wrestling around in the mud. They probably shook hands after and became best buds.

Thankfully, justice was handed down by a judge. And be thankful it didn't go to a jury - can you imagine what would have happened had this case been decided by a group of this man's peers? How long would the deliberations have been? They would have spent weeks debating whether the truck got stuck because it was a Ford or a Chevy (with the accompanying Calvin pissing sticker). They also would have spent endless time arguing over whether the real culprit was the field - and the traction difference between canola and wheat. Even if they resolved that, another two weeks would have been spent arguing whether the policeman should be charged instead for killing a good buzz.


Anonymous said...

You're right - you can't make this stuff up. The drink-driving culture in this province is beyond sickening. I've never seen a place where there are so many empties - cans, bottles and even entire cases - laying in the ditches as I've seen here. This story is just plain (and sadly) typical. Can't wait for a good 'ol local boy to try to deny it. LOL

Anonymous said...

Thank you for continuing your blog as you live in Beautiful BC! I spend half my time in bc, the other half in that AWFUL province. It really does suck there. Only there for the oil. Your blog has given me much laughter. Cant wait till the day I don;t have to go back there..only fly over it.

Anonymous said...

What a second. Someone from BC trashing sask. Are we talking about the BC with the highest level of child poverty in Canada - 1 in 5 kids. And the BC that is the least happy place to live in Canada (along with Ontario). Or is this the BC where a favourite son hockey player can't even walk around downtown and get a drink without getting punched or where hockey mom's get randomly beaten to death. Classy place.

Anonymous said...

What a second. Someone from BC trashing sask.

Yep, tells you how bad Saskatchewan is, doesn't it?

If all the really crappy places are a breath of fresh air compared to Sask, then man! what a frozen hell-hole it is!

Anonymous said...

Agreed. Shitola

Anonymous said...

Don't forget: Half of Saskatoon drives around in pick-ups!

Anonymous said...

booze cruise without a boat!